• "If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining..." - M. Moss

Followers

Hikmah Surah Al-Waqiah
Dipos oleh avid

Ni cerita member gua. Nama dirahsiakan atas dasar hormat terhadap kawan. Okay, namanya Malik dan beliau berumur 24 tahun.

***

Perjalanan pulang Malik dari rumah aweknya ditemani perasaan resah. Sejak bertunang, sudah beberapa kali Malik diminta oleh bapak aweknya untuk makan malam bersama keluarga aweknya. Dan sudah beberapa kali itu jugaklah Malik menolak atas alasan 'ada hal' kepada bakal bapak mentuanya.

Bukanlah Malik tak sayang aweknya. Kalau tak, masakan pula dia beria nak ikut aweknya pindah Serdang dan cari kerja baru. Dekat sikit nak dating, ujar Malik.

Malik mengelak kerana Malik sedar jemputan bakal bapak mentuanya itu bukan sekadar untuk melahap makan malam keluarga aweknya. Malik tahu masa itu lah dia akan dinilai, dihakimi oleh mak bapak mentuanya dari segi agama, adab makan, adab pergi tandas, adab lepas makan dan adab bersendawa.

Dikalangan rakan-rakannya, Malik terkenal dengan makan stail Abu Lahabnya, sendawa stail Abu Jahalnya, dan kencing stail cina mabuknya. Malim juga agak liat kalau dimintak jadi imam.

Tapi sejak berkapel dengan aweknya, Malik banyak berubah. Makan dah beradab. Sendawa pun dia potong kecil-kecil jadi sendawa sikit-sikit. Kencing pun dah rajin balik rumah. Cuma bab semayang Malik tak banyak ubah. Masih dengan perangai semayang Maghrib pukul 8 suku nya.

Nak dipendekkan cerita, satu hari Malik terima juga pelawaan bapak mentuanya itu. Dia datang rumah aweknya pukul 6 lebih seperti yang disuruh bapak mentuanya.

Bila masuk maghrib, Malik disuruh jadi imam. Bergegar badan Malik bila melangkah ke depan jadi imam. Kakinya jadi tak stabil. Tapi digagahnya juga. 

Pada rakaat pertama, Malik baca surah Al-Waqiah yang dihapalnya seminggu lepas khas untuk hari-hari istimewa seperti hari itu. Lancar Malik membacanya meskipun dadanya macam nak pecah.

Bila masuk ayat yatuufu-alaihim-wildaanum-mukhalladuun, Malik jadi blank. Malik lupa apa ayat seterusnya. Dia cuba memerah otaknya tetapi setelah 13 tahun menonton porno, otaknya terlalu keras untuk diperah. Setelah agak lama terdiam, Malik cancel baca Al-Waqiah dan baca Inna-a'toina pulak.

Masuk rakaat kedua, Malik cuba baca surah yang panjang sikit dari Inna-a'toina tetapi otak Malik bercelaru. Agak lama dia berpikir nak pilih surah apa. Blank sangat, dibacanya Inna-a'toina sekali lagi. Bakal bapak mentuanya tergelak dan terus batal semayang. Akibatnya, semua orang kena semayang maghrib balik.

***

Selamat pengantin baru, Malik. Pesan Malik kepada budak bujang macam gua, jangan beria hapal Al-Waqiah untuk impress bapak mentua.

Photo

Thursday, December 9, 2010

pada 11:57 AM


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20 nyamuk:

December 9, 2010 at 12:11 PM
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said...

ayat awal da buat gwa gelak.
hamsap.

December 9, 2010 at 12:31 PM
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said...

hehehehehe..pengajaran:)

December 9, 2010 at 12:34 PM
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said...

hebat juga hapal al-waqiah. itu surah pemurah rezeki...jgn tak tahu ;) baik korg amalkan...

December 9, 2010 at 12:34 PM
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said...

Malik was almost going to be one E.F.G. LOL!

December 9, 2010 at 12:57 PM
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said...

hahahaha

yang penting dia tahu nak jadi imam.

i mean lelaki basic agama kena la kuat sikit. xperlu surah panjang2 yang penting kau tahu nak jadi imam and kau tahu yang rukuk dulu baru sujud.

selamat pengantin baru malik ;))

December 9, 2010 at 1:23 PM
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said...

yupp setuju dengan erine. tapi asasnya lelaki kena la tau surah2 utk dibace :)

December 9, 2010 at 2:29 PM
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said...

hahaha. malik sangat lawak okay. at least he can be the imam/leader for his family kan? alhamdulillah.

selamat pengantin baru malik. :)

December 9, 2010 at 2:41 PM
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said...

walaupun tak berjaya nak impress ur future-father-in-law, but still its a good try.ape pun, paling penting ikhlas.dan mmg klaka ksah nie.haha

December 9, 2010 at 2:49 PM
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said...

nasib baik bapak mertua dia tak pangkah dia. haha. dia nampak usaha malik kot?

ahaks!

December 9, 2010 at 3:52 PM
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said...

tak boleh nak gelak...
sebab takut akan jadi kat bakal husband i..

tapi surely i'll ask him not to do such thing..
(:

December 9, 2010 at 9:44 PM
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said...

erk..ok la tu..at lesat dia ada ubah something utk jd lebih baik..

December 10, 2010 at 1:49 AM
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said...

hahaha. macam lahanat. lagu mana kencing cina mabuk. bercabang ke apa benda.

baca surah tiga qul ja. senang sikit. lu pulak. bila nak kawin der?

December 10, 2010 at 10:28 AM
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said...

kira macam gempak la jugak dia boleh baca Al-Waqiah, walaupun bukan keseluruhannya.

masa sekolah dulu memang mak aku suruh semua anak-anak perempuan hafal Al-Waqiah. siapa yang baca surah ni 40 malam berturut2 kan, sampai bila-bila dia takkan dilanda kepapaan. i mean takkan jatuh miskin & rezeki terpelihara lah :)

December 11, 2010 at 11:37 AM
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said...

phuff..

lu mmg lawak der... dem

February 17, 2011 at 4:27 PM
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said...

ehh, malik tu dah nak kawen ke? hahaha.

p/s: nmpk sgt aku dok baca entri2 lepas kau kan? terharu tak? terharu tak? hehe.

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August 3, 2011 at 6:58 PM
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